*Closed* RRRR - Shakespeare Insults render contest

24

Comments

  • luci45luci45 Posts: 2,759

    Thanks, Gopherus, Totte, Diomede_Carrara and Tynkere. 

    Diomede_Carrara - Hillarious! I love the poses and story. (I pulled the bore-hog this time.)

    Pull #3 - Thou wayward shard-borne boar-pig!

  • luci45luci45 Posts: 2,759
    edited June 2019

    Tag: luci45 #3
    Thou wayward shard-borne boar-pig!

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  • TotteTotte Posts: 13,974

    @Luci45: Luci#3 Haha Fabolous! Is it a bird? Is it a plane? No, It's the boar-pig!

     

  • luci45luci45 Posts: 2,759
    Totte said:

    @Luci45: Luci#3 Haha Fabolous! Is it a bird? Is it a plane? No, It's the boar-pig!

     

    Yes, pigs can fly! Thanks, Totte.

    Pull # 4: Thou tottering dismal-dreaming clothpole!   I think that should be "clotpole." It's right on your list but not in the script. (I only know because I googled it.)

  • TotteTotte Posts: 13,974
    edited June 2019
    luci45 said:
    Totte said:

    @Luci45: Luci#3 Haha Fabolous! Is it a bird? Is it a plane? No, It's the boar-pig!

     

    Yes, pigs can fly! Thanks, Totte.

    Pull # 4: Thou tottering dismal-dreaming clothpole!   I think that should be "clotpole." It's right on your list but not in the script. (I only know because I googled it.)

    probably damn auto-confuddle! I take a look

    Post edited by Chohole on
  • TynkereTynkere Posts: 834
    edited June 2019

    Luci #3

    Pig in a poke who likes to smoke (and some sort of beverage too) Good one!

    You’re really setting a high bar here.  Scattered shards-- clever!  :)    

    ---

    My SSD crashed about a month ago, so restoring my desktop hasn’t been fun.  Rendering silly Shakespeare much more fun. :)

    Anyway, I think ‘Varlot’ (varlet??) meant knave, rogue, or rascal.  If a rogue is sometimes a thief... 

    ---
    Dankish hedge-born varlot!

     

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  • TotteTotte Posts: 13,974
    edited June 2019

    Tynkere: Luci is an old Indian word fo "very High Bar", and good one! Hedge Fund people can be so cruel to gardeners ;-)

     

    Post edited by Totte on
  • luci45luci45 Posts: 2,759

    Thanks, Tynkere and Totte. 

    LOL, Tynkere, that is so cool. I love the two hedge references. 

    This contest is pretty fun. Shakespeare would possibly approve. Totte set the bar for crazy s***. It's a magnetic bar that pulls in the rest of us. 

  • TynkereTynkere Posts: 834

    Thanks-- all of you here have more experience than I do, but it's is a fun way to learn.  :) 

    Pull 2: "Mammering, plume-plucked, mammet"  

    I think it means"stuttering humbled dim-wit"  Have to give some thought to that one. 

  • LaPartitaLaPartita Posts: 406

    Totte - what an awesome idea for a contest! 

    I couldn't resist sharing one of my favorite actual Shakespearean insults:

    "Thou art a base, proud, shallow, beggarly, three-suited, hundred-pound, filthy worsted-stocking knave; a lily-liver’d, action-taking, whoreson, glass-gazing, superserviceable, finical rogue; one-trunk-inheriting slave; one that wouldst be a bawd in way of good service, and art nothing but the composition of a knave, beggar, coward, pandar, and the son and heir of a mongrel bitch."  (King Lear, Act 2, Scene 2)

  • 3dcheapskate3dcheapskate Posts: 2,719

    Totte - what an awesome idea for a contest! 

    I couldn't resist sharing one of my favorite actual Shakespearean insults:

    "Thou art a base, proud, shallow, beggarly, three-suited, hundred-pound, filthy worsted-stocking knave; a lily-liver’d, action-taking, whoreson, glass-gazing, superserviceable, finical rogue; one-trunk-inheriting slave; one that wouldst be a bawd in way of good service, and art nothing but the composition of a knave, beggar, coward, pandar, and the son and heir of a mongrel bitch."  (King Lear, Act 2, Scene 2)

    ...and now you have to render that !

  • TotteTotte Posts: 13,974

    Totte - what an awesome idea for a contest! 

    I couldn't resist sharing one of my favorite actual Shakespearean insults:

    "Thou art a base, proud, shallow, beggarly, three-suited, hundred-pound, filthy worsted-stocking knave; a lily-liver’d, action-taking, whoreson, glass-gazing, superserviceable, finical rogue; one-trunk-inheriting slave; one that wouldst be a bawd in way of good service, and art nothing but the composition of a knave, beggar, coward, pandar, and the son and heir of a mongrel bitch."  (King Lear, Act 2, Scene 2)

    ...and now you have to render that !

    Yes Render it!

  • SaphirewildSaphirewild Posts: 6,668
    Totte said:

    Totte - what an awesome idea for a contest! 

    I couldn't resist sharing one of my favorite actual Shakespearean insults:

    "Thou art a base, proud, shallow, beggarly, three-suited, hundred-pound, filthy worsted-stocking knave; a lily-liver’d, action-taking, whoreson, glass-gazing, superserviceable, finical rogue; one-trunk-inheriting slave; one that wouldst be a bawd in way of good service, and art nothing but the composition of a knave, beggar, coward, pandar, and the son and heir of a mongrel bitch."  (King Lear, Act 2, Scene 2)

    ...and now you have to render that !

    Yes Render it!

    I agree she should render it now that she announced it in here!!

  • 3dcheapskate3dcheapskate Posts: 2,719
    Totte said:

    Totte - what an awesome idea for a contest! 

    I couldn't resist sharing one of my favorite actual Shakespearean insults:

    "Thou art a base, proud, shallow, beggarly, three-suited, hundred-pound, filthy worsted-stocking knave; a lily-liver’d, action-taking, whoreson, glass-gazing, superserviceable, finical rogue; one-trunk-inheriting slave; one that wouldst be a bawd in way of good service, and art nothing but the composition of a knave, beggar, coward, pandar, and the son and heir of a mongrel bitch."  (King Lear, Act 2, Scene 2)

    ...and now you have to render that !

    Yes Render it!

    I agree she should render it now that she announced it in here!!

    Actually, come to think of it... I think that's the curse the bard himself uttered when his Word* Processor, Oswald, lost the entire draft of "Thirteenth Night - being a tale of nefarious deeds just before the weekend" ?

    *I resisted the temptation to spell that 'Worde"...

  • NovicaNovica Posts: 23,887

    Tag: Diomede #1

    Thou villainous, fen-sucked, boar-pig

    When visiting her grandmother, Big Red Riding Hood thought she was being clever when she avoided the wolf by cutting through the fen instead of the woods.  But the three pigs went to the fen to avoid the wolf also.  One of the pigs was quite greedy, and the other two followed his lead. 

     

    Well, I learned a Fen was a low-lying marshy area!  
    Very clever! 

  • TynkereTynkere Posts: 834
    edited June 2019

    @LaPetiteVerita

    I took drama as an elective once.  That would be a tongue twister.  Breathe at the semicolons?  That's a lungful for one breath!  Anyway, one more vote that you should give it a try.  No group pressure or anything... devil


    Pull 2:

    This one seemed hard.  I didn’t want to make fun of people with a speech impediments, but maybe cold water would make someone stutter?

    Anyway here is...

    A Mammering, Plume-Plucked Mammet


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  • LaPartitaLaPartita Posts: 406

    *facepalm* I should have seen that coming.

    Okay, time to break out my copy of King Lear and find a library that has a copy of the Oxford English Dictionary. Challenge accepted!

  • TynkereTynkere Posts: 834
    edited June 2019

    *facepalm* I should have seen that coming.

    Okay, time to break out my copy of King Lear and find a library that has a copy of the Oxford English Dictionary. Challenge accepted!

    Great!  Looking forward to seeing what you do with it.  

    If remember correctly, “Fishtales” helped quite a few of us with your project, a lady holding up a glowing rubber duckie?  I’d have never thought of something like that.  Perfect for RRRR in my opinion!  laugh


    Anyhoo...  Maybe three's a charm 

    paunchy, hasty-witted, bum-bailey

    1.) corpulent, or having a ‘beer belly’...

    2.) rash, lacking sufficient care, consideration, or forethought...

    3.) (derogatory) an unpopular profession: a bailiff empowered to serve writs, collect debts, etc.   

    So...

    “Fat foolish constable”  ???

    Trivia: in Texas, anyone can run for county or district constable.  You don’t have to be a policeman or even have training in law enforcement.    Elected constables serve warrants for too many parking tickets & things.  Understandably, they avoid ‘real’ criminals and call the police.  : 0 !

    Post edited by Tynkere on
  • 3dcheapskate3dcheapskate Posts: 2,719
    edited June 2019

    Sorry, but I have to do this to get it out of my head... it's causing a creative block !

    Tag:3dcheapskate #1

    Thou Fobbing Base-Court Miscreant ! Thou Cannot Be Serious - The Ball Was IN !

    Fobbing: I think the term can be said to encompass "passing off bad decisions as good decisions" ?
    Base-court: I'm making it an abbreviation of "baseline of the tennis court"... whence the "chalk flew up" of course
    Miscreant: False believer - prefix 'mis-' meaning wrongly, and 'creant' (ultimately from the Latin 'credere', to believe) For as we all know* - "the ball was IN !"

    This insult would, as we all know*, be just the start.  LaPetiteVerita's favourite "Thou art a base, proud, shallow, beggarly, three-suited, hundred-pound, filthy worsted-stocking knave; a lily-liver’d, action-taking, whoreson, glass-gazing, superserviceable, finical rogue; one-trunk-inheriting slave; one that wouldst be a bawd in way of good service, and art nothing but the composition of a knave, beggar, coward, pandar, and the son and heir of a mongrel bitch." would probably come next, followed by every permutation that Totte's Shakespearian Insult generator can come up with.

    Next insult, #2: "Thou infectious flap-mouthed lout!"

    Bring on the zombie plague perhaps ?

    After some (fairly minimal) research:
    Infectious: not just a disease-bearer, but could also mean simply a bad influence.
    Flap-mouthed: I thought this would be somebody who talked a lot (or a zombie with a flip-top head - Braindead anybody?). But apparently it's more literal than that - somebody with a wide mouth and floppy lips !

    Lout: a dullard, bumpkin, idiot. But could also mean a clown.

     

    *For those of us who don't - John McEnroe's famous 1981 "You cannot be serious".

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  • luci45luci45 Posts: 2,759

    Thanks, Tynkere and 3dcheapskate. I feel inspired now to do another one. I love the mammering mammet. And the tennis player was perfect! 

    I am also looking forward to LaPetiteVerita's render. laugh

  • luci45luci45 Posts: 2,759
    edited July 2019

    tag:luci45 #4
    Thou tottering dismal-dreaming clotpole!

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  • TynkereTynkere Posts: 834
    edited July 2019

    Been busy I see.

    @3DCheapskate

    Fun play on words!

    The line judge is taking bribes.  That would be a real... Tennis Racket?  Sorry.  Like puns, just not very good at them!  ; )

    @Luci45

    LoL.  He has a little liquid courage doesn’t he?  

    She’s flattered and agrees to a date with him.  (Provided he does her math & science homework.)

    His girlfriend gets back at them by posting video from a camera she has hidden in her glasses.  

    Revenge of the nerds!  : 0 !


    For mine... Well I just couldn’t resist putting the jack rabbits in there. 

     


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  • 3dcheapskate3dcheapskate Posts: 2,719
    edited July 2019

    whoops - inadvertantly hit 'Save' before I'd finished started!
    I'll repost when my critical appraisals of all the entries are complete ! wink

    Post edited by 3dcheapskate on
  • 3dcheapskate3dcheapskate Posts: 2,719
    edited July 2019

    Tag:3dcheapskate #2

    Thou Infectious Flap-Mouthed Lout

    K-9 (to the scutter): "Well 4457, I do believe that's the last we'll see of that annoying cat."
    K-9 (to the trashbot): "Now begone thou infectious flap-mouthed L.O.U.T., and durst not thou tarry hereabouts and such !"

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  • luci45luci45 Posts: 2,759
    edited July 2019

    tag:luci45 #5

    Thou warped motley-minded giglet!

    Clara Clown-Muse inspired this (sadly unfinished and unpublished) sonnet:

    Thou warped motley-minded giglet be,
    Who findest me un-mused in grim despair.
    As thither flew true beauty's company,
    Now hither flies thy gaudy vixen hair.
    Wretched surrogate obscene disrupter,
    whence wretched hour or misbegotten clime
    Com'st thou, ill-bred grievious vixen lewdster
    To vex my soul with beslubbering ryhme?

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  • luci45luci45 Posts: 2,759

    Tynkere - I love it! Really suits the insult. never use a Shakespeare insult on a state trooper. The punster rabbits are great, the frosting on the cake. laugh
    3dcheapskate - Poor kitty! Love the LOUT. So clever. And no organic figures visible. surprise

    #6: Thou froward half-faced miscreant!

  • SaphirewildSaphirewild Posts: 6,668
    edited July 2019

    Tag: Saphirewild #1

    "Thou craven fat-kidneyed flax-wench!"

    Candise and Frank never did get along but he always showed up everyday and asked for her by name to serve him his bowl of fruit. She was always poliet with him but he would be insultive and sometimes threw the fruit at her.

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  • SaphirewildSaphirewild Posts: 6,668
    edited July 2019

    Pulled Insult #2 "Thou puking fool-born scut!"

    The meaning according to Myway search "As a dog returns to his vomit"

    Post edited by Saphirewild on
  • GopherusGopherus Posts: 1,108
    edited August 2019

    Gopherus #1

    Thou mangled motley-minded fustilarian

    While Mistress Ford looks on, Mistress Page metes out a well deserved comeuppance to Falstaff.  His crime?  Sending identical love letters to Mistress Page and Mistress Ford and addressing them "Dear Sir or Madam as the case may be"  Maybe that is normal in London but not here in Windsor!

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  • GopherusGopherus Posts: 1,108

    I almost got this done before disappearing for vacation.  Summer is so frenetic!

    @Diomede #1  LOL!  Everywhere there are lots of piggies living piggy lives.... hope she did not bring any BLT sandwiches

    @Luci#2  Ah!  tribbles... how can something so cute be so annoying... nice one!

    #3 Flying pigs... what a great screen saver!

    #4  Definitely a clotpole... what a clod!  poor x girlfriend.... good one!

    #5  Shakespeare is rolling over in jealousy... he must wish his sonnets were as colourful.  well done!

    Tynkere #1  Born and raised in the hedge row, brer Grump.  Nice one!

    #2  Something cool for the summer... i feel cooler just looking at it.  good one!

    #3  I bet the patrolman will want to look under the hood to see how that old antique is still able to run... well done!

    @Sapphirewild #1  Candise had such patience.... I hope she included worms in her apples... extra protein... good one!

    @3dcheapskate #1  i believe in one of the baseball films the manager used shakespeare to address the umpire... so why not bjorn borg?  nice one!

    #2  so that is what droids are saying to each other... i always wondered if c3po was translating accurately... good one!

    and a drumroll.....  #2  Thou dankish folly-fallen ratsbane!

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