The Vigilante. Episode 3

geoff6

Hi all,

Episode 3 of my feeble submission, The Vigilante is up on youtube at last: https://youtu.be/zTTilZ75A2M

As always, your comments are welcome...

Thanks in advance,

G

FirstBastion

The voice acting is quite good,  and the dialogue itself is really good. There's good cohesion in the script and the storytelling.  I like the picture editting choice too,  Quick in and quick out on the scenes,  no lingering,  all gelling to move the episode story forward efficiently.  I liked the crane shot up through the window at the beginning too.  Particualrly liked the performance of the bar manager lady at the beginning.   Looking forward to the next one.  

geoff6

FirstBastion, thank you for taking the time to watch the video and pass on your comments and thank you for offering such encouragement. I don't know if you've had time to watch the previous two episodes but if you do, you'll see that each builds on techniques and experience gained. As I'm sure you know, it's a long and lonely enterprise but to receive such a positive response on a forum full to the edges with such talented and creative people makes it worth the effort.

G

FirstBastion

To quote the dialogue "It shows a sense of the dramatic"

I always say, we all learn from doing.  Keep it up. Each episode is a little more refined.  The one thing I am wondering though,  is the motivation for the action.  I want to latch on to the protagonist,  important in any cinematic story,  but so far Lilly is a bit distant. 

Ivy

I really enjoyed your story, nice work putting it all together :)

geoff6

Ivy, thank you. That is praise indeed.

FirstBastion, Lily has a back story that is revealed in the 4th and final episode but she is a cold killer, a sort of female Leon. However, I think the major problem is her voice which is synthetic. It is a good synthesis, about as good as I can get it anyway but lifeless nonetheless. This is principally why she hasn't spoken until now. My problem is a shortage of female vocal talent, while the female detective and 'Snitch' characters are quite good for an amatuer,  the cold, flat and importently, English delivery that I want from Lily is difficult to come by, so if there are any volunteers out there who can put down a decent voice recording, I'm listening...

I've read in many other postings that it's a good idea to build your project around what you have and what you know, I understand what that means and will continue to take on board all the comments I get to help me with that. Maybe series 2 will have a budget for some voice talent... Maybe even an Nvidia 1080, but definately some of your excellent sets!

Thanks again,

G